Jefferson Fisher, a prominent trial lawyer, recently shared insights on the subtle clues that may indicate deceit during an episode of the podcast “Diary of a CEO.” He pointed out one particularly telling word that indicates liars are often telling a “dead giveaway” for their deception—“never.” Study participants kept a journal of their deception, noting lies told during the day. What they found was stunning—only 69% reported even a lie, with 22% of people claiming they only tell self-serving lies, and 8% saying they lie to spare others’ feelings.
Fisher explained that when individuals are confronted with questions, such as whether they were texting while driving, they may respond with extremes. For instance, they might initially say, “No, I never text. Never text when I drive.” When you push back then, they’ll fall into internal contradiction and say, “oh, no, I mean occasionally I do.” This new language is significant as it further highlights the lack of credibility to their very first claim.
As Fisher writes, the term “never” is one of the biggest warning signs that someone is lying. He stated, “Notice I said a big word. I said ‘never’. Never is an extreme. Extremes are a dead giveaway that they’re usually not telling the truth.” This wisdom focuses our attention on listening for key words that will tip you off to someone’s true agenda.
Fisher continued to paint the grim picture of how universal the behavior of texting and driving is. He noted, “Everybody texts when they drive at some point in time, even in your car. Never and always. It’s always or never true. So that’s a big one.” This point of view undermines the black-or-white nature to claims that sometimes come from those who have a tendency to fib.
What we learned from his TED talk provide a captivating look at human nature and the psychology of deceit. Identifying behaviors and unique terms that are red flags for lies gives you the ability to steer conversations to your advantage. We want you to be able to tell what’s real and what’s fake.
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